hair is sparse, just some hairs, mostly in sideburn area. They
are darkening, but still pretty soft. They are bristly when
short, but not very coarse yet. The neat thing is I need to
shave at least every other day or I look scruffy, kinda.
Seven months on T* and I am
so happy at the changes. No hips, straight down thighs and
some facial hair. Awesome start to the new year.
||Got my hair cut
shorter than usual. It looks pretty good though. Almost
Military. Really short on sides and back, you can see scalp,
and a bit longer, but not much, on top. My voice seems to have
stabilized at this level of deep bass. It feels more normal
now. I never had the squeaks and breaks that some guys talk
about, I just always woke up and it was deeper. It has been
really neat to feel the changes. My whole chest and throat
vibrate in a weird way, it is like a drum rolling through my
chest and up. But now I feel pretty used to it, it isn't as
funny feeling all the time as it was.
Got a good job in an office.
Finally, I wear suits and ties to work. Actually I quit
wearing a suit the first week, just shirt and tie. I started
out as a temp, doing some bookkeeping, and by the end of the
week they asked me to go full-time as the payroll and HR
manager. I guess all my experience as a manager has finally
paid off. Just super to come to work every day as a regular
guy in an office job. Another dream realized.
||Really the only
change is more sideburn hairs, and now I have to shave under
my chin every day. Some days I shave under when I get home,
because it is really irritating on my neck. Maybe this is
something I will get used to, but for now it is a pain. A
wonderful pain though. I just wish my face had half the hairs
and coarseness of my chin, then I could grow a beard no prob.
It is neat to talk to my dad
and realize that my voice is deeper than his. He is funny in
that he rarely calls me Devin, and almost always says she, but
he treats me like a guy. He doesn't every hug me anymore, just
kinda a half hug and slap, or a clap on the shoulder. He has
been good about giving me clothes, shirts and suits and lately
shoes. I think he is surprised that they fit. I mean I am
5'5" barely and he is 5'10", but since I am pretty
heavy, we both wear the same size shirt. Sleeves are a bit
long on some, but mostly they fit pretty well. The shoe thing
though surprised him. I don't have big feet, but they do fit
in his 10's, and that's all I care about. Actually I wear 9
1/2's mostly, but I can wear his no prob.
||Seems to be a
plateau, no real changes lately, kinda hard seeing the start
of facial hair, and then it goes nowhere. I thought when my
chin came in so dark and coarse that my face would start to
change, but noooo, not to be.
Work is great, I got a fat
raise after one month, and am able to start paying some bills.
I love working and just being a plain guy. One guy is becoming
a bud, and he is really cool. I have a buddy just like I
always saw other guys have. I don't know haw to explain it,
cause I have some good friends, but this is my first regular
guy friend, where we just sit and talk trash, politics, women
etc. It is kinda the way I always saw other guys hang, but was
never included that way, even when I was "one of the
guys" before. Life is good. It gives me a lot of
confidence too to have some facial hair, that when I don't
shave for a day or two kinda looks like a shadow. Plus this
deep voice. Awesome!
||Sideburns are now
pretty dark and I have to shave every day. By the end of the
day they are rough and I live the sound in my ear as I run the
back of my hand over that area. When shaving, I shave lightly,
so that they still kinda show. Awesome.
At work I got my own office
with my name on the door. Pretty awesome. No more cubicle.
Freaking awesome life at this point. Still way behind on
bills, especially my doctor. It is so freaking expensive to
have the liver panels and T* levels run. But she won't
prescribe the T* without them.
I still self -inject and it
is funny to think a year ago I was just starting. Although my
facial hair is not what I want, everything else is perfect.
Straight down hips, vice, face is more masculine, I have to
shave, I have more confidence, etc. I remember my first few
months and how everyday I was counting the days to the next
injection. Now, I forget constantly. I have to have a reminder
to remind me or I usually end up a day or two past. Funny how
that changed. It is just a part of my life now, not the
defining point of every other week.
||I have started to
let my mustache come in. My upper lip is pretty hairy, it's
just that they were light for so long. Now they have darkened
appreciably and I'm gonna let them grow out.
||Mustache is going
pretty good. It is not really full or anything, but it is
better than a 15 year olds fuzz. I love having to trim it,
cause every week they grow down on my lips and it tickles. I
have let the sides get longer and they curl around my mouth a
bit. I love it. My love laughs when she kisses me now, it just
trips her out. I got razzed a bit as I let it grow out, and it
was kinda fun. But now it is just normal.
Finally asked out a girl at
the place I work part-time. At first she said no, but then I
asked again, and she said yes. All the guys at work have been
hot for her, and I feel like top dog going out with her. We
went downtown for fireworks, and it was the first time I was
at something like this as a guy on a date. It was awesome. We
get along really great, and I am pretty comfortable with her.
I HAVE A 'STACHE!!!!
||Been dating for a
month now. Still going well, but we haven't done more than
kiss, so she doesn't know. I had another first for me. I
actually took a girl to a wedding reception, as a man. A
friend from work had gotten married out of town, and then held
a reception for her friends here. My girl looked wonderful,
and I was soooo proud. I had always gone to these functions
before by myself, as all my girlfriends were all straight, and
we didn't go to stuff like that, our lives were rather
private. So this was a milestone for me.
Still after all these months
I feel so cool being a guy. Talking shit with the guys
flirting with the women and just being able to be me without
wishing or worrying how others saw me. Now I know how they see
me... as I always saw myself. It just makes me feel so secure.
It was one thing to pass before, I was lucky, but the changes
T* has made take it to a whole new level. I no longer
feel afraid that someone will find me out.
||Sideburns are in
pretty thick, 'stache is decent and I have to shave daily or
it's really noticable, not just a little noticeable. The only
problem is no hair under the line out from my lips. No hiar at
all, its like the hair came in on my sideburns and down and
some on my cheeks, but none along my jaw. I really hate that.
Football started, and I have
seats at our local stadium for the Carolina Panthers. I take
different guys from work mostly, and then I have been with the
VP's of the company to our Company Box. Second row, right
behind the players. It is so awesome to be a guy. I knew it
would be, but this is just better than anything I could think
||I love waking up
in the morning, showering and then looking in the mirror at my
stubble. Of course my jaw line is still bare, but I have to
shave everyday. It is so awesome to come home, and if I go to
the sink there are all those thousands of hairs from shaving
lining the sink. Didn't expect that so many little things
would be so happy making, but they are.
Bought an electric shaver,
Braun, middle of the road price, but it works like shit. It
doesn't seem to cut them at all, at least not closely, but it
is kinda fun, and I love having the shaver sitting there in
the bathroom. Looks cool. I feel like a kid with a new toy.
||The stubble under
my sideburns and on my cheeks gets daily thicker and coarser.
But that baby smooth jaw line pisses me off.
I have let the sides of my
mustache grow long and the hairs are fun to play with with my
tongue and pulling into my mouth. I love rubbing my 'stache,
and running my tongue up in it. Feels so cool.
some dark hairs on my chin. It sucks cause there are only
about 15, but hey they are there. My cheek and sideburn
stubble are giving me a shadow by the end of the day.